Isn't it ironic how you can be totally on a mountaintop one day and then BAM you are down in the valley again. I was just going thru all of my blogs and writing some of them down in my journal, for "just in case" and BAM I'm slapped in the face with my own words!!! In just a weeks time, I've slipped back in to a funky mood...
I went to Asheville this weekend and hung out with some friends. Funny that one of them posted about exactly what I was feeling when with all of them...alone. Why do we feel we have to debate on who is right about what? Why try to bully our Christian brothers and sisters into "I'm right, you're wrong" so there...
It was SO exhausting, and I felt SO disconnected and flat out annoyed. We are supposed to encourage each other in the word, to be there to lift each other up, and help to mature each other in our faith. Instead it's "this church is awesome, and what wrong with you that you don't feel that way too." UGH! I get so frustrated with that! yes, we all have our preference of what kind of church and worship we want/choose to be a part of...just because one is different than the other doesn't make one more right than the other. If they are preaching the undeniable, infallible word of God, and not straying from it...who cares if they raise their hands in worship, who cares if the jump up and down, who cares if they don't!!!! If you have the Holy Spirit in you, then no matter what, you will know if God is in that church, be it traditional, contempory, or charismatic!
If God is in the house, THEN GOD IS IN THE HOUSE!!!!
We are called to build each other up, not try to prove "this is better than that." What happened to our love, especially among our brothers and sisters in Christ?
There's a problem when we'd rather sleep in than to go to a church on Sunday because we don't agree with one of their ministers on staff and that inhibits our ability to praise. We ought to be anxious and excited because we get to worship in the house of the Lord with fellow believers, and that we have the freedom to do so without fear of death, or exile like some countries around the world.
May God give me back my passion for worship, whether in my house or in another house of worship. May God give me peace and keep me at peace during "debates." May God grant each of us the ability to shut our mouths, when they need to be shut! Lord help me to follow what YOUR will is, and not my own. I'm just as imperfect as the next person, may I remember that and never give up striving to be more Christ-like.
2 Corinthians 4:16-17
"That is why we never give up. Though our bodies are dying, our inner strength in the Lord is growing everyday. These troubles and sufferings of ours are, after all, quite small and won't last very long. Yet this short time of distress will result in God's riches blessings upon us forever and ever!"
May I daily desire to seek time with the Lord so that I will walk in His ways and not my own! How awesome that God sees my inabilities and doesn't criticize or condemn me for it, but in Him I am made strong. he understands me like no one else can!
Psalm 147:5 "How great He is! His power is absolute! His understanding is unlimited!"
"We can never understand all about ourself, but God understands us completely. Sometimes we feel as if we don't understand ourself-what we want, how we feel, what's wrong with us, or what we should do about it. But God's understanding has no limit, and therefore He understands us fully. If you feel troubled and don't understand yourself, remember that God understands you perfectly. Take your mind off yourself and focus it on God. Strive to become more and more like Him. The more you learn about God and his ways, the better you will understand yourself." - Handbook of Bible Application
Monday, September 25, 2006
Saturday, September 16, 2006
Lots to say lately
So...I was a bookworm today and read "Blessed Child" by Ted Dekker & Bill Bright. It's on eof those books taht really makes you aware of how much we take our raith for granted. I totally recommend this book!
I often wonder, just like 2 of the main characters in the book, where are the modern day miracles? yes, I have seen people healed and I have known about the healing of others, But the book did open my eyes to the fact that not only are we not truly walking "in the kingdom" on a daily basis, but it is so much more of a miracle when someone accepts Christ than when a body or physical need i smet.
The healing of someones heart, their soul is so much more important than physical healing HOWEVER...when Jesus healed in the Bible, he didn't say "do you believe in me..." he would ask simply "do you want to be healed?" Jesus alwaays met thier physical needs and then if they wanted to believe in him, that was their choice.
Jesus gave each one of us that walk with him that same power to meet the physical needs of those around us in order for them to know his power. But the greatest miracle of all, is when someone realizes how much they need him in their lives and in their heart and truly experience the joy of Christ coming into their lives and healing their heart, mind and soul.
I have many friends who haven't experience that joy yet. so many think that having a relationship with Christ is not being able to "have fun" not being able to do things. It's so hard to explain how much freedom there is in having Christ in my life. The peace that I constantly have NO MATTER the circumstances. The joy that I ahve no matter what happens, no matter what comes my way.
I'm still human and will always make mistakes. There will always be times taht I act out of my own stubborn will instead of Gods will...but I know the freedom it is to live in Christ and for Him to live in me. I know the freedom from burdens, because he carries them for me. So many of my non-Christian friends simply want to debate, and don't like that I won't argue with them. They don't realize it's not that I'm backing down. I have no need to debate or argue the issue...I know what God has brought me from, I'm a living testimony to how life sucks without Him, and how awesome it is...awesome only because of him living in me!
PRAISE JESUS!
Jeremiah 29:11-14 "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hop and a future. Then you will call upon me and come an pray to me, and I will lsiten to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you, declares the Lord, "and will bring you back from captivity. I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you, " declares the Lord," and will bring you back to the place which I carried you into exile."
So many times (and I am SO guilty of this) we only read vs. 11. But how awesome the next verses are as well. It's all about getting back to the basics, about having that childlike faith from where we started. Sometimes we get so involved in doing things for the Lord, and making sure we "act" like a Christian that we lose sight of exactly what it is we have in Him. We forget the basics of simply relishing spending time with Him. We forego reading the words he left to guide us, to help us deal with our daily life.
What happened to that fire that we first had when God delivered us? Can you remember it, when you just couldn't get enough of His word?
One of my Favorite songs to "get my praise on" is Donnie McClurkin's "Great is Your Mercy"
"Great is Your Mercy towards me
Your lovingkindness towards me
Your tender mercies I see
Day after Day
Forever faithful towards me
Always providing for me
Great is your mercy towards me
Great is your grace"
They sing the same lines over and over again, and I'm overwhelmed.
I fail God in so many ways on a daily basis that it humbling to know and realize how much mercy God shows me on a daily basis, with every second of every day...May I never foget or take for granted who God is in my life, and what he's done not only for me...but what he wants to do for each of you as well!
I often wonder, just like 2 of the main characters in the book, where are the modern day miracles? yes, I have seen people healed and I have known about the healing of others, But the book did open my eyes to the fact that not only are we not truly walking "in the kingdom" on a daily basis, but it is so much more of a miracle when someone accepts Christ than when a body or physical need i smet.
The healing of someones heart, their soul is so much more important than physical healing HOWEVER...when Jesus healed in the Bible, he didn't say "do you believe in me..." he would ask simply "do you want to be healed?" Jesus alwaays met thier physical needs and then if they wanted to believe in him, that was their choice.
Jesus gave each one of us that walk with him that same power to meet the physical needs of those around us in order for them to know his power. But the greatest miracle of all, is when someone realizes how much they need him in their lives and in their heart and truly experience the joy of Christ coming into their lives and healing their heart, mind and soul.
I have many friends who haven't experience that joy yet. so many think that having a relationship with Christ is not being able to "have fun" not being able to do things. It's so hard to explain how much freedom there is in having Christ in my life. The peace that I constantly have NO MATTER the circumstances. The joy that I ahve no matter what happens, no matter what comes my way.
I'm still human and will always make mistakes. There will always be times taht I act out of my own stubborn will instead of Gods will...but I know the freedom it is to live in Christ and for Him to live in me. I know the freedom from burdens, because he carries them for me. So many of my non-Christian friends simply want to debate, and don't like that I won't argue with them. They don't realize it's not that I'm backing down. I have no need to debate or argue the issue...I know what God has brought me from, I'm a living testimony to how life sucks without Him, and how awesome it is...awesome only because of him living in me!
PRAISE JESUS!
Jeremiah 29:11-14 "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hop and a future. Then you will call upon me and come an pray to me, and I will lsiten to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you, declares the Lord, "and will bring you back from captivity. I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you, " declares the Lord," and will bring you back to the place which I carried you into exile."
So many times (and I am SO guilty of this) we only read vs. 11. But how awesome the next verses are as well. It's all about getting back to the basics, about having that childlike faith from where we started. Sometimes we get so involved in doing things for the Lord, and making sure we "act" like a Christian that we lose sight of exactly what it is we have in Him. We forget the basics of simply relishing spending time with Him. We forego reading the words he left to guide us, to help us deal with our daily life.
What happened to that fire that we first had when God delivered us? Can you remember it, when you just couldn't get enough of His word?
One of my Favorite songs to "get my praise on" is Donnie McClurkin's "Great is Your Mercy"
"Great is Your Mercy towards me
Your lovingkindness towards me
Your tender mercies I see
Day after Day
Forever faithful towards me
Always providing for me
Great is your mercy towards me
Great is your grace"
They sing the same lines over and over again, and I'm overwhelmed.
I fail God in so many ways on a daily basis that it humbling to know and realize how much mercy God shows me on a daily basis, with every second of every day...May I never foget or take for granted who God is in my life, and what he's done not only for me...but what he wants to do for each of you as well!
Monday, September 11, 2006
Blessed
I'm sitting here listening to one of my favorite groups Brooklyn Tabernacle Choir. I'm telling ya, I'm ready have church right now, here in my living room! If you ever have the chance you ought to find the "God is Working" CD and listen to the song "More than Enough".
It goes thru some of the names that God has been called by and reminds me that God is ALWAYS MORE than enough for me. The whole CD is so anointed and blessed. You can feel the Holy Spirit moving thru every word of every song. But back to the song "more than enough"
"Jehovah Jireh My Provider
You are more than enough for me
Jehovah Raepha You're my healer
By your stripes I've been set free
Jehovah Shammah You are with me
To Supply All My Needs
You are more than enough
More than enough
You are more than enough for me"
As it goes on and builds more and more...I feel the Spirit rising up in me...I become so overwhelmed that I can barely speak, sing or breathe. It never fails that every time I hear it, I'm reminded how I've been set free by the power of the Holy Spirit, never to be in bondage again!
Hallelujah...PRAISE JESUS I'M HEALED, I'M ALIVE, I'M PROVIDED FOR AND I'VE GOT MORE THAN ENOUGH FOR ALL MY NEEDS!!!
It goes thru some of the names that God has been called by and reminds me that God is ALWAYS MORE than enough for me. The whole CD is so anointed and blessed. You can feel the Holy Spirit moving thru every word of every song. But back to the song "more than enough"
"Jehovah Jireh My Provider
You are more than enough for me
Jehovah Raepha You're my healer
By your stripes I've been set free
Jehovah Shammah You are with me
To Supply All My Needs
You are more than enough
More than enough
You are more than enough for me"
As it goes on and builds more and more...I feel the Spirit rising up in me...I become so overwhelmed that I can barely speak, sing or breathe. It never fails that every time I hear it, I'm reminded how I've been set free by the power of the Holy Spirit, never to be in bondage again!
Hallelujah...PRAISE JESUS I'M HEALED, I'M ALIVE, I'M PROVIDED FOR AND I'VE GOT MORE THAN ENOUGH FOR ALL MY NEEDS!!!
Sunday, September 10, 2006
Thoughts
Recently someone I grew up with got back in touch with me via MySpace. As wonderful as it is to get back in touch with people from my past, it also brings up several memories, most I'd like to not ever remember. So much from my past growing up in Louisiana is so painful for me...but it got me to start thinking as well
So many of the people I grew up with that were my "friends" never knew the real me. It got me thinking about the friends I have now. Do I allow them to opportunity to really know me? Or do I continue to repress everything, keep a wall up to make everyone believe everything is OK?
I remember one instance in high school going out one night with my supposed "friends." We all went to the movies. I didn't get to go often and wasn't invited often. Mainly because I had to work a lot of the time, and being raised in a single parent home with 3 kids, there really wasn't much money for things like that. Most of the times these people didn't even think to invite me because they assumed i wouldn't be able to come, but this one time really sticks out.
We went to the movies. Afterwards, we were all going to go to someone's house to hang out. I had ridden with someone, because I didn't have a license yet. I went to the restroom after the movie, came out to find that they'd left me there. They'd forgotten I was with them. They forgot me there, and didn't even notice for over an hour that I wasn't with them. I was devastated.
How many times are we so involved in our own personal dramas, our own personal thoughts that we've forgotten those around us. God has called us to love one another, unconditionally, without reasons, without expecting something in return...just the way that He loves us.
How often do we ever truly care to ask someone how they really are? Many of those "friends" I had never even noticed I had moved from Louisiana until years later. Many of them, if not all, never knew how sad and lonely I was even when they were all around me. Many to this day don't know I contemplated suicide in high school several times...We always say "How ya doing?," but do we really mean it? Do we really care? Are we willing to take the time to see past the facade and the "Fine" Do we honestly love each other enough to care?
I've grown up now and that was more than 12 years ago. I still ahve to check myself and be introspective to this day to see if when I'm listening to my friends...am I really listening? Am I looking past the surface to who they really are?
Some verses came to mind when I look back and I look at the present. I'm so blessed that God has brought me so far from where and who I was. God has truly blessed my life and put people in my life to encourage and lift me up, and people I can do the same for! God has also given me freedom from the bitterness I once had toward those in my past.
My favorite verse is :
Zephaniah 3:17"The Lord your God is with you, He is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you. He will quiet you with his love; He will rejoice over you with singing."
God rejoices over each one of us every day! He actually takes delight in us! On the days I feel the most down, on the days when I feel alone, I simply look at that verse and am amazed at how much God loves me...insignificant me! The fact that even at my worst he takes delight in me, that he would quiet my fears, my longings, my thoughts, my lonelieness, my many many faults, and will quiet those with his great & mighty love...never ceases to amaze me beyond measure!
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perserveres. Love never fails. but where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perection comes the imperfect disappears." 1 Corinthians 13:4-10
I know this is most often heard at weddings. But how awesome to be reminded of how we should love each other. Not becasue we want something from them, but simply because we love them. Love never fails...NEVER!
Everything stops for love. We are all imperfect, and yet when perfection (God) is there all of our imperfections disappear. How awesome to know that!!! How awesome it is to know that in God's prescence all of my imperfections disappear!
So many of the people I grew up with that were my "friends" never knew the real me. It got me thinking about the friends I have now. Do I allow them to opportunity to really know me? Or do I continue to repress everything, keep a wall up to make everyone believe everything is OK?
I remember one instance in high school going out one night with my supposed "friends." We all went to the movies. I didn't get to go often and wasn't invited often. Mainly because I had to work a lot of the time, and being raised in a single parent home with 3 kids, there really wasn't much money for things like that. Most of the times these people didn't even think to invite me because they assumed i wouldn't be able to come, but this one time really sticks out.
We went to the movies. Afterwards, we were all going to go to someone's house to hang out. I had ridden with someone, because I didn't have a license yet. I went to the restroom after the movie, came out to find that they'd left me there. They'd forgotten I was with them. They forgot me there, and didn't even notice for over an hour that I wasn't with them. I was devastated.
How many times are we so involved in our own personal dramas, our own personal thoughts that we've forgotten those around us. God has called us to love one another, unconditionally, without reasons, without expecting something in return...just the way that He loves us.
How often do we ever truly care to ask someone how they really are? Many of those "friends" I had never even noticed I had moved from Louisiana until years later. Many of them, if not all, never knew how sad and lonely I was even when they were all around me. Many to this day don't know I contemplated suicide in high school several times...We always say "How ya doing?," but do we really mean it? Do we really care? Are we willing to take the time to see past the facade and the "Fine" Do we honestly love each other enough to care?
I've grown up now and that was more than 12 years ago. I still ahve to check myself and be introspective to this day to see if when I'm listening to my friends...am I really listening? Am I looking past the surface to who they really are?
Some verses came to mind when I look back and I look at the present. I'm so blessed that God has brought me so far from where and who I was. God has truly blessed my life and put people in my life to encourage and lift me up, and people I can do the same for! God has also given me freedom from the bitterness I once had toward those in my past.
My favorite verse is :
Zephaniah 3:17"The Lord your God is with you, He is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you. He will quiet you with his love; He will rejoice over you with singing."
God rejoices over each one of us every day! He actually takes delight in us! On the days I feel the most down, on the days when I feel alone, I simply look at that verse and am amazed at how much God loves me...insignificant me! The fact that even at my worst he takes delight in me, that he would quiet my fears, my longings, my thoughts, my lonelieness, my many many faults, and will quiet those with his great & mighty love...never ceases to amaze me beyond measure!
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perserveres. Love never fails. but where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perection comes the imperfect disappears." 1 Corinthians 13:4-10
I know this is most often heard at weddings. But how awesome to be reminded of how we should love each other. Not becasue we want something from them, but simply because we love them. Love never fails...NEVER!
Everything stops for love. We are all imperfect, and yet when perfection (God) is there all of our imperfections disappear. How awesome to know that!!! How awesome it is to know that in God's prescence all of my imperfections disappear!
Sunday, July 30, 2006
Alrighty now...I'm SO excited!!! I'm going on vacation Wednesday. Carolina Mass Choir is going to Jackson, MS and Brownsville, TX to do concerts. How cool is that?!
We are leaving early, early on Wednesday morning. It's only 20 hours to Brownsville, no big deal right?... haha :)
It reminds me of back in high school, all the choir trips we used to take on charter buses. I'm so so so excited! and besides, I'll be off work for 4 days and that's always a bonus!
I am also excited because I'll have a roommate to share my house with soon. Her name is Melanie and she'a young lady I know from TN. She's going to be going to college over here in SC.
HOW FUN!!!
We are leaving early, early on Wednesday morning. It's only 20 hours to Brownsville, no big deal right?... haha :)
It reminds me of back in high school, all the choir trips we used to take on charter buses. I'm so so so excited! and besides, I'll be off work for 4 days and that's always a bonus!
I am also excited because I'll have a roommate to share my house with soon. Her name is Melanie and she'a young lady I know from TN. She's going to be going to college over here in SC.
HOW FUN!!!
Thursday, July 27, 2006
Carolina Mass Choir
So I just got back from my 1st road trip with the Carolina Mass Choir. OH MY GOSH, we had SUCH a blast! God blessed me so much on this trip. He enabled me to bond with those in the same van as me. I didn't feel self-conscious and was able to just enjoy them and laugh with them and be myself. God has given me another family to enjoy!!!
We were bless to be able to minister in song to a church in Maryland. They were SO fabulous to us! It was so awesome to be able to just bask in God's glory while singing...and to know those around me in the choir were doing the same.
We were bless to be able to minister in song to a church in Maryland. They were SO fabulous to us! It was so awesome to be able to just bask in God's glory while singing...and to know those around me in the choir were doing the same.
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